enjoyed cuteness

if i had one thing that was on my christmas list, this might be it.  no that is a lie because i pretty much fall in love with EVERYTHING i encounter that is cute, small, asian, etc.  this is all of the above.  it's a rilakkuma lap top!  thank goodness i have a boo who can just make me an image to make a laptop skin since they only made like 500 of these 2 years ago!  sad face.

i guess this is a dog house but i was pretty sure it was a playhouse of a clubhouse for me.  i always dreamed of having a secret clubhouse.  we did have one in a shed for a couple summers at one of our cottages growing up.  we used to build forts and try to create sanctuaries for just us.  it gives me the goosebumps to think about those days and how much i wish i was small, hopeful, and looking for a place to call my own.  i think someday i will build a little hobbit house like this for my kids so they can feel the same.

EDIT: this is actually called the hobbit house and here is where you can find it

http://www.etsy.com/listing/55772413/unique-hobbit-fairy-style-wooden

i hate this bitch but i like these pictures.  the past two kdramas i have gotten into she always plays a bitch.  also she has had WAY TOO MUCH plastic surgery.  her jaw doesn't even look real...but i digress, i like these photos.  kinda. :/

oh hai!  can i have this life?  i'll take all of it.  i wanna be this.  i will be this.  CONFIDENCE. checklist: extra large shirt, velcro shoes, long hair, heavy eye makeup, skintight pants/leggings, rad style.  

 i also bought these boots (in black) to help move me in the right direction:

i have just now finished an awesome kdrama called "playful kiss"and it was way cute.  the main character oh hai ni (as seen below) it a total cutie pie and she inspired me to figure out how to do my hair like that.  braids are so hot.

this show also showed me what it is to be a cool 8 year old.

i found this cool nail tumblr and it's a german chick i think.  she does some of the best nail art!  i totally love her style.  i need a hot minute to do some of this stuff to myself.

ENJOY!!!

anatomy of a miami housewife

so i have been giving housewives a lot of thought lately.  to me, it's a dream job.  especially if you are rich!  if you are a rich housewife, the job just gets better...its the best job out there i think!  i have had about 14 weeks to observe some of Miami's finest richest housewives at work each day.  i have created this simple equation for attaining such grandeur.

first of all, it goes without saying that to become a glamourous housewife you need the money and the house.  i don't feel like google imaging that shit so whatever, here it goes:

you have to have the hot shiny new car, preferably a black range rover.  it can be white but black is preferred.  if you have don't have the range you gotta get a BMW or Benz.  a G-wagon is also acceptable but those things are LOUD and obnoxious.  the range rover just screams, "i am hot, rich, and have too much time on my hands."

the next thing you need is a little dog.  must be small enough to take everywhere.  i work at a school and part of my job is getting the kids out of the cars in the morning.  i see just about as many little dogs as i do children...i like little dogs but i don't see the point in using it as an accessory!  it must be a yorkie, pomeranian, or chihuahua.  i have seen pug puppies carried as if they are babies all around the school.  NEVER LET THAT DOGS FEET TOUCH THE GROUND.

botox and collagen are a must!  any housewife that hasn't had a little nip or tuck isn't legit.  if they tell you they are 100%, it's probably a lie!  the lips are to be accentuated and there is not a wrinkle in sight.  

a good base tan is important.  bronzed skin = bronzed goddess.  in miami you don't have to work too hard to get a tan.  just lay outside for a little while and BAM!  TAN!  i have a feeling the truly legit housewives go for the fake bake as to not risk the wrinkles or freckling.  otherwise that means more botox and laser treatments than necessary!

workout wear 24/7.  you drop our kid off and you wear your hot workout clothes to fit your hot body.  i wonder if these moms actually work out after dropping the kid off or if it is all for show.  more often than not, the moms wear their yoga pants, slouchy sweaters and sportswear.  it must be designer!  no marshall's discount rack shit allowed!

the biggest sunglasses known to mankind are also important.  the bigger the better.  the bigger the sunglasses, the more rich you may be.  preferable brands include dolce & gabbana, chloe, chanel, and the occasional ray bans.  however, ray bans are usually reserved for rich high schoolers or college kids with mommy and daddy's credit cards.

tory burch flats are a staple of rich housewives.  these bitches float on air or walk the dog in these (if they even walk their own dog).  tory burch flats are NOT CHEAP.   i was going to buy a pair (see silver pair in the middle row far left) but i just couldn't justify spending $100 on flats, and those were on clearance!  not gonna lie, i still want some.  then i will know i have made it!

the drink of choice/champions.  i could use a perrier right now.  so delish!

so that pretty much sums up my observations and aspirations.  maybe someday i will be so lucky to be the glam housewife...maybe...

crushable moments.

i die.  joseph gordon-levitt singing bad romance.  i wish there was a better quality vid!!! :(

ps: somehow i had like 135 hits on my site yesterday and over a hundred for the past few days before that!  what's the deal yo?  keep em coming plz!  

it's been too long!!!

ugh so today i took my social sciences subject area test.  the test was all history, geography, political science, yada yada yada for grades 6 through 12.  omg that shit was hard.  BUT I PASSED!!!!  i am free to blog again instead of holing up in dark corners of coffee shops for hours a night trying to memorize the civil war or some shit.  history is sad and whack and i just don't wanna go back to that dark place...lol

i want these braids!!!  i can't even do a french braid!  i think it's genetic because when i was in the 5th grade my mom tried to do a french braid on me for my school picture.  she wasn't very good at braiding and it was too loose.  my hair just kind of puffed up and i looked like a baby vampire or something.  it was sad.  i love this look though, the braids and the bubblegum lipstick.  maybe i could rock that?

these are the coolest things i have ever seen!!! i want one asap!  i could never afford the real deal phillip tournaire rings so do you think someone like urban outfitters or some run of the mill normal people store make some cheap copies?  i would appreciate that.  and if you all wanna get me a gift for christmas, this will suffice.

my boo made this cute cute cute kitty picture.  i believe it was modeled off my favorite breed: the exotic shorthair.  these cats are more like aliens which is why i need one ASAP.

a part of me wants this life.  it wants to be clean and clear and uncluttered.  the fact is i am a pack-rat.  i can't let stuff go.  everything someone makes for me, every letter, picture, card, i keep it.  how else will i remember all those great moments?  over the past year i have pruned down my collection of crap (specifically clothing) but i want to get to THIS point.  help me please?  tips and tricks to having a crazy cute clutter-free life?

since today was my first day off in a while i stayed in tonight (not like i have anything better to do...) and watch a movie.  the darjeeling limited was ondemand for free!  so i watched it since i had not seen it in years.  i had forgotten about the train stewardess rita.  she is so beautiful!  her glasses, her eye makeup and her hair are just to die for.  i keep telling my boo to grow his hair long so i can use his indian hair for a weave.  I AM DEAD SERIOUS I NEED YOUR INDIAN HAIR.

friendly submissions:

i love it when my friends post things on my wall or email me cute things!  i can always use the material, so if you see anything please send it my way!  i want to share the cuteness with the world.  this is a submission from my friend anna (miss you bbgurl) and it's boo!!!!  i love boo.  i wanna cuddle with a million boos.  WAHHHHH!!!!

this one came from evelyn!  "A two-headed red-eared slider turtle is seen at Xiaoyaojin Park in Hefei, Anhui province, China. The three-day-old turtle is in a good condidtion, despite its two heads." 2 headed turtles are not my usual idea of cute, but these lil guys melt my heart.  i hope they make it.  too cute to die.

i am feeling dark today so this is my jam:

long time no post.

NEW MOTTO:

ain't that the truth!  just kidding!  i don't get pussy but i kinda want that beautiful piece of cross-stitch on my wall.  i am not so bad at cross-stitch myself...maybe i should give it a shot.  perhaps a jerri blank quote?

i have been away so long because i have been CRAZY BUSY!!! i have been studying everyday for hours at starbucks for my certification test.  it's killing me!!!  i have not stopped at all except this past weekend.  i went to boston to visit my boo.  we had a great time!  he was rufio (of HOOK) and i was ramona flowers (of scott pilgrim vs. the world).

actual vs. expected.  

i think it turned out awesome!  i loved it and i wish i could dress up like her all the time.  except no one knew who i was!  it's like no one ever saw the movie or read the books.  i have read all of them but one at the moment.  i love them and i love that character.  i only wish i had taken more pictures.  the moments leading up to it all were exhausting so i was like fuck it, no pictures.  BAD CHOICE.  but it's cool because i already know what i am going as next year...362 days to go!

this embodies my boo's spirit.  he is a true mountain cat.

JERSEY SHORE HALLOWEEN H2OH-NO

i will tell you one thing, i saw A LOT of jersey shore costumes this year.  mostly i saw a lot of BAD jersey shore costumes.  they just dressed like sluts and painted themselves orange.  there is so much more to jersey shore than that.  it's all in the details my friends.  these 6 year old WAYYYYY outdid any person i saw as jshore this year.  they got all the little things right.  sammi's too short shorts, snookie's sweats-style, and pauly's headphones that seem to be fused to his neck.  lil geniuses.  

speaking of genius: ALL HAIL THE PICKLE QUEEN.

Adventures in Education:

so i got my school pictures back a while ago and i have been wanting to post them.  GROSS is all i have to say.  i guess some things never change.  i will never be able to take a good school picture.  even when you are the teacher, all those flaws come right back out.

shiny face: check.  frizzy hair: check.  wonk eye in full effect: check. face that looks bloated and gross: check.  maybe next year will be different.  MAYBE NOT.